tchau, brasil! te amo!

so, tonight is my last night here in belo horizonte... sad face.

amongst the visiting friends and family, running last minute errands and packing (and re-packing), i´ve been reflecting over two lists that i wrote during BIP training back in april before i came to belo...

during training, patty (LOVE her!) asked us to write down some things on one list that we hoped to do or accomplish during our time in brasil and on another list to write down some areas we hoped to grow or mature in... i found my lists last night while packing and started going over my lists, crossing things off... remarkably, i accomplished almost all of my personal goals! :)

being here in brasil has been challenging at times being ´out of my element´, but it has also been the most natural experience for me, too... this summer was the time i needed on my own (in some respects) to explore, learn, discover, and grow...

i thought i knew my strengths and weaknesses before i came here but brasil has made me transform into a different person, with different strengths and different weaknesses... my three months here were an opportunity to see my life from the inside out and the outside in, at the same time... it was rather peculiar at times, existential almost, being an outsider in your own life, but from another vantage point i learned that happiness is truly relative...

how can i ever complain about things in my life when i actually know people in this world who have a much more difficult situation? i just can´t anymore.

it would have been so easy to have seen this experience as 12 weeks in paradise (which it so easily could have been), but i wanted to get as much out of these 12 weeks as i could... and i believe i did. thank God. :)

leo and i went to the creche today to say goodbye to the NAC staff and the kids before we leave tomorrow... the younger kids in the morning session were just precious and did not comprehend (or didn´t want to acknowledge) that we were leaving tomorrow... they just kept saying, ´´see you tomorrow!´´ broke my heart all over again... things weren´t much better in the afternoon as all of the teenage kids were elated that we came back one more time and wanted to show us things, talk with us, hug us just one more time...

perhaps, just maybe, i did something kind one day or said something supportive when someone needed it, and it influenced these kids in a positive way... hopefully they already know or will realize later that they are honestly and truly loved for who they were and are to me... those smiling, loving kids with hopes and dreams as high as skyscrapers embody what brasil is to me.

before leo and i left the creche, sylvia took us upstairs to see the floor-mats they were able to purchase with the money my friends and family donated... half of their order had been delivered and assembled like puzzle pieces in their dance studio... the mats were red and blue and about 3´´ thick, perfect the instructor leo to begin karate and taekwondo lessons... sylvia said they have already had one karate class last week and the kids loved it! thank you, thank you, thank you again for your monetary donations to this very deserving place!

as we said our 1,289th ´goodbye´ and hugged the kids and staff, someone started to cry... and whaddya know, it wasn´t me this time?! lol i heard sniffling, then i turned to my left and my group of teenage girls were all crying and saying, ´don´t go!´, then we hugged and i started crying, then i looked to my right and the tough teenage boys were crying with leo pleading for him not to go! pretty soon everyone was bawling and hugging, hugging and bawling!!! we finally managed to get everyone to calm down and assured them we´d come back to visit them again, we all had a big group hug with the kids and the staff and then we were finally on our way...

there were smiles and laughter and hugs and TONS of tears... that´s how i know it was a summer well-spent.

friends and family, what a beautiful summer it has been. thank you for coming along on this personal journey with me! i am going to ask for your continued prayers as i start my graduate program this week at the university of st. thomas, i go in for advising and registration on thursday and have graduate orientation on friday and saturday, then school starts monday!!! sooo excited!

i am praying for you as always, please pray for safe travels for me and my fellow BIPs... we are all sad to leave our brasilian families and friends and yet anxious to see our friends and family back home in texas! i´ll have an update on our adventure back to the states as soon as i am in front of a computer...

til then, tchau!

~crystal

rio, i think i love you...

okay, so rio has been my therapy...

i came here with nothing to do except do things I want to do... it has been great. hanging with my fellow BIPs (NICK, we miss you!!!) and exploring the city... we arrived this afternoon, found our bus from the airport and checked in at our hostel... i LOVE IT. i wish i could travel all the time...

this afternoon i thought about how wonderful it would be if i could budget to travel every summer, like my friend adrienne... she is a school-teacher and has some time during the summer to spend with friends... i have always wondered how she does it, but now i KNOW it is POSSIBLE!!! lol

also, i found out that i am quite efficient when it comes to directions like north, east, south, west.. after landing at santos dumont, i was able to orient myself (without a map) and find the right street and the right bus that took us to our hotel in lapa... we walked around a bit until i asked someone for directions to our street and we found our hostel immediately... i am SO proud of myself...

perhaps i am meant to travel and experience other cultures??? things certainly don`t seem to be pointing towards a relationship or marriage, so maybe i found my passion in life? jk jk

as of right now i am about 8 days away from returning to the states and i honestly couldn`t be more sad... i don`t know that i know who i am anymore and will certainly be searching for a while... but i am looking forward to starting my master`s in a few days and getting back to a regular routine of school and work... which, by the way, if you know of a job opening in houston, texas, let me know! i am currently searching for housing, a job and a car all at the same time and it`s a bit worrisome... i`m leaving it all in His hands, so i know things will turn out ok... but just pray for me, okay? thanks...

i just wanted to say a quick thanks to all my family and friends out there who have supported me both financially and with prayers over these last few months... the reality of everything kind of hit me the other day and i can`t believe i have such amazing people around me helping me through everything... you are what gets me through the rough days and reminds me that God is always by my side... i love you for that, no words can exactly describe...

you`ve made a new person out of me by supporting this experience... i love love love you.

i can`t believe how quickly time has passed, either... i am counting down the days when i can get back to BH... i can`t believe i have to go. sad face. :[

prayers, please, as i am on official vacation in rio... hoping to see the cristo redentor monument, the pao de azucar and ipanema beach... ohhh to have a situation-less vacation would be nice!

can`t wait to see you all... hope you`re having as great a summer as i am! love, love, LOVE brasil. <3

um abraco,
crystal